Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Last week in New York...

Last week I travelled down to New York with a big agenda for fun and celebration - the lavish Indian wedding of a dear friend of my husband's, as well as my own birthday. We'd talked about this trip for a few months and were looking forward to a little extra special time together as a couple. Unexpectedly, and very last minute, plans changed. I found myself alone in Manhattan. Initially we both went through a period of extreme frustration, and I found myself wandering around fully preoccupied by my mourning what 'was supposed to happen'. What should have been a period filled with fun exploration was clouded with feelings of disappointment, frustration and even guilt. But then, something kind of wonderful happened. I remembered I actually quite like being alone. In a city surrounded by millions, I found myself savouring the solitude and slowly started to see how this situation, while not the ideal I'd had in my mind might just be alright after all. 

One thing I've learnt in life, and keep being reminded of along the way, is that life rarely conforms to any of my expectations. With family, in marriage, and in the general comedy of errors that life often presents to us - things rarely look the way you thought they would when you get there. While there's nothing wrong with planning for the future, and even getting excited about those plans, things often end up a bit differently. It's ok to feel a little disappointed. Ultimately though, the only thing that determines how happy I am is whatever is going on within the confines of my own mind. And you know what? I can have a pretty amazing time. All by myself. 

{All photos by the talented Jamie Beck of From Me to You}


Annie said...

A beautiful post. This is so true, and I have experienced scenarios like this myself time and time again. Ultimately, I am reminded that I, too, enjoy moments of solitude. I cherish and savor them actually. And I love what you say about balancing your planning for the future with a flexibility and openness to what may arise in the meantime. Thanks for sharing this.

Hind said...

I relate to this post in every single word, I have been thought same situation last September when me and ex decided to go to Lebanon for a vacation, offered me few weeks to spend together to relax and kick off, I was so happy in every way for the news and I was preparing myself for the experience but in just 3 days he had to cancel it all and we ended up having a major problem not to mention the result but believe me I did just like you did. I tried to enjoy my time anyway like if this was the actual plan to be there alone.



Christina said...

I've been there. In 2009 when me and my husband took a trip to Barcelona I spent the last afternnon wondering around the newer part of the city alone. But I didn't mind at all. Actually it would mind me more if I hadn't gone for that walk.
Wonderful pictures by the way!

escapade said...

Annie - It's amazing how sometimes the things that seem to happen by accident end up being the best of all!

Hinda- thank you for sharing this story! it's funny sometimes how we're almost frightened at the prospect of our own company, but always encouraging when you realize, you might actually prefer it.

Christina - there's something lovely about these solitary moments isn't there? I find too, you often discover some beautiful things in those moments that could have easily been filled with conversation if you hadn't been on your own.


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